Danglin Kitty

Late the other night Friskie climbed into our bed to sleep. He has his own bed, in the other room, but tries to sneak into ours late at night when we're sleeping. Now the reason we don't let him sleep with us is that he is a big hairy cat that drags around half the yard in his fur and leaves half of it wherever he makes a pit stop. When he jumps onto the bed I hear him. Its kind of like someone dropping a bag of potatoes at your feet. I'll pick him up and he'll cackle and grunt in protest while I carry him back to his room.

So the other night was no different until I went to lay him down. The fat bugger wouldn't let go. He had draped his paws over my shoulder and hooked his claws into my t-shirt. As I bent over he slid out of my arms except for one paw. The back of my shirt went up and over my head and he dangled there.... all 18 lbs of him.. Now he was pissed and started squirming and twisting attempting to free himself. I was blind and any attempt I made to try and grab that stuck paw was met with a swipe from the free one. His weight had my shirt twisted around my head so I couldn't get it off. I was bent over keeping him as far from me as possible...kind of like a cat pendulum. So we kind of just hung there for a few seconds while he got more and more agitated. The embarrassment of yelling and waking up my better half, outweighed exercising that option. He was now on the verge of doing some serious damage. I swung my body towards his bed and pinned him down, one hand grasping his free paw. I reached around the back of my head and grabbed the other paw hoping to pull it loose. No dice. It wouldn't let go and now his back legs were attempting an appendectomy on me. We kind of wrestled for a few tense seconds until the paw popped loose. I held him down for the five count and walked back to bed feeling like Hulk Hogan on a good night. Damage report: a few scratches and a t-shirt that now looks like it was worn by the fat lady at a circus.